This Is Why Vietnam Is Covered In Garbage

I love Vietnam but it is by far the dirtiest place I have ever been to in my life. Here's a perfect example of why there is trash everywhere. While waiting for Huyen at a shop, I observed this xe om driver:

(PICTURE: Notice the white piece of trash on the ground to the right of the can.)

I took this picture moments after he threw that piece of white trash on the ground next to the garbage container. The guy made an attempt at getting the trash in the container but made zero attempt at picking up the garbage when he missed. In his defense, the effort he would have to take to walk two feet away sounds excruciating.

I took the above picture because I thought the moment was blog worthy. However, less than a minute later he made it extra blog worthy. The dude took out a piece of paper from his pocket, read it over, crumpled it and dropped it on the ground.
(PICTURE: See the trash in front of the bike. That's the one I'm talking about.)

The guy then got up and walked away, leaving both pieces of trash for someone else to deal with. Am I wrong to say, WHAT THE FUCK!!! The guy was right next to a fucking trash can. Put the garbage in the can you fucking asshole! Sorry had to get that off my chest.

What I don't understand is this: Vietnamese people have so much pride in being Vietnamese. However, where's the pride in keeping their country clean?

Adventures with my mother-in-law!!! PART 3

(PICTURE: My mother-in-law looking at a tiger in Saigon.)

Upon returning to Hanoi, I took Huyen, my mother-in-law and Su out to dinner. We had a good meal with about four dishes and some special clay pot rice. The total cost of the bill came out to about 300,000 VND or $15. To me, I'm more than happy to pay for four people if the total cost is under twenty bucks. Hell, you can barely order an appetizer and a drink FOR ONE in America without it costing more than $15. However, to my mother-in-law this cost an arm and a leg. When she saw the bill her eyes lit up as if the waitress was holding me up at gun point. She was so shocked in fact that she kept the receipt to show my father-in-law. In their defense, they could probably eat breakfast, lunch and dinner for five days for 300,000 VND. However, we're talking about a restaurant in the city! I keep giggling to myself, imagining how Huyen's parents would deal with visiting us in America. I'm pretty sure this is what would go through their minds: "$12 for a piece of chicken! Not even the whole chicken? A piece? And it doesn't even have bones!!!"

Adventures with my mother-in-law!!! PART 2

(PICTURE: Huyen and my mother-in-law enter the fourth dimension.)

After going through the haunted house, Huyen and my mother-in-law went to see a 4-D movie. This alone is funny to me since Huyen's mom has never been to the movies. Instead of starting off with a conventional 2-D film or even jumping on the overrated 3-D bandwagon that has hit the world as of late, she went right in for a 4-D movie. If you've never been to a 4-D movie, the fourth dimension is the sense of touch. I saw a 4-D movie about ten years ago when I worked at Disney World in Orlando. The special 4-D element then was that something moved in the seats which felt like we were all sitting on bugs. Well, apparently they haven't figured out more way to add the fourth dimension -- or they boxed up and shipped the Disney theater here -- because that was exactly what happened in the film Huyen and her mom saw. Her mom jumped up when the "bug" in the seat started moving around. She also ducked when objects were shot at her in the movie. At some point she told Huyen that they should move to the side of the theater so everything wouldn't fly at them. Clearly she hadn't quite understood how 3-D works...but then again, I don't really understand how it works either.

Adventures with my mother-in-law!!!

(PICTURE: My mother-in-law in front of the amusement park.)

Full disclosure: I was not actually present for this episode of ADVENTURES WITH MY MOTHER-IN-LAW. However, Huyen borrowed my camera and told me some great blog-worthy stories that I'll recount over the next couple of days.

As you may recall, about a year and a half ago I went to the beach with my now mother-in-law. At the beach my mother-in-law, grandfather-in-law and all my other in-laws freaked out when they saw the crashing waves. Believe it or not new readers, it was their first time seeing the sea. Yes, they all have grown up and never left a country lined with water but never managed to travel to the coast. Sadly, this is the norm here. That's all to say that many people don't get out much so when you put them into a big city, lots of things seem odd to them.

Recently Huyen had to go back to HCMC to pick up her American visa. Huyen's mother expressed interest in visiting her brother in Saigon so we immediately bought her a plane ticket to join Huyen. Unfortunately we didn't check with Huyen's uncle to see if he was going to be in town though and he happened to be away that weekend in Hai Phong. The best laid plans...

Despite not seeing her brother, Huyen and her mom had a great bonding weekend which has entertained me with many stories. Here's the first one:

Huyen and her mother went to an amusement park just outside of Saigon. I've passed this park before but have never gone inside. Needless to say, I'm pretty sure it's no Great Adventure. Well, Huyen called me after going to the park and told me about experiencing the haunted house with her mother. To summarize, they took about two steps into the house of horrors before my mother-in-law was scared out of her mind. She tried to go back through the entrance but was stopped by the woman behind them. The woman told Huyen's mom: "If you are in good standing with Buddha then you have nothing to fear." Yup, there's crazy religious people who follow Buddhism too. Huyen said that her mother grabbed hold of the Buddhist lady and didn't let go until they exited the haunted house. I have been told that this is the last time my mother-in-law will go into a haunted house.

The Guessing Game

What do you think this is:



A) Brownies.

B) Shit in a bowl.

C) Congealed blood.

D) One of my father-in-law's favorite foods.

Think it over...

Give it another second....

Okay, the answer is...

C & D. Yeah, it was a trick question. That is congealed blood that my father-in-law loves to eat. I swear I almost popped one into my mouth when I first saw it because I was sure it was brownies.

Visiting Graves

(PICTURE: Visiting my father-in-law's family tombstones.)

During Tet we always visit the graves of Huyen's relatives. This was my third time visiting the graves and I've been touched each and every time. A few thoughts about this:
1. We visit each cemetery for five to ten minutes. This might seem like a short time but how many of us are guilty of never visiting our relatives tombs?

2. While at the cemetery, we clean the tombstones and remove weeds. In America, this is usually done by the cemetery where people are buried. In Vietnam it is the family's responsibility.

3. This is the only time I ever see Huyen pray. She isn't religious at all but merely puts her hands together, bows and says a few words to her deceased relatives. I like being there to see this.

4. Huyen's family likes when I take pictures of them at the cemetery. I learned my lesson a long time ago that Vietnamese like to have these moments of showing respect documented.

5. I'm always especially taken back when we go to the military cemetery to visit the empty grave of Huyen's uncle. Huyen's uncle was killed in the war with America and his body has never been recovered. This saddens me deeply.


(PICTURE: Visiting Huyen's uncle's grave at the military cemetery.)

Japan Disaster

The Japan earthquake and tsunami disaster is happening in Fukashima, the prefecture I lived in last year while I was teaching in Japan. I've received a lot of emails from people asking how my friends are, especially Masumi and Kensuke who came to my wedding a few months ago. With all the bad news, I'm happy to report that Masumi and Kensuke are both okay and so are their families. It took two days for them to get in touch with Kensuke's sister in Sendai but she is thankfully okay.

Masumi says that as of today they have water at their house as well as power. The building Masumi and Kensuke work in is damaged and not safe to go to. Today Masumi helped at the evacuation center.

I was quite scared for a couple of days about my coworker Katie who lives by the beach with her husband. I couldn't sign into facebook so I had a few friends send her messages. Today, Katie emailed me and she and her husband are doing okay. They had to evacuate their home though because it is too close to one of the nuclear reactors that is having problems.

We're glued to the TV/internet here and wishing we could do more. Thanks for all the emails about my friends and I'll keep you posted!

Ben