Sunday, November 9, 2008

"My Dad Would Like To Buy You A Drink""

Last night one of the stranger ever happened to me. No, not one of the stranger things in Hanoi...but in life.

I was at a restaurant drinking and eating with my frisbee friends when I felt the need to go #1. I walked over to the WC and saw that the bathroom door was partially open. Having been in this bathroom twice already during the evening I knew that if the door was open that meant nobody was probably inside since it was a one person bathroom. My thinking was wrong though and it turned out there was a man -- who I'm guessing was around 58 -- taking a piss. The man quickly blurted something out in Vietnamese as I quickly muttered an apology in half English and half Vietnamese. About twenty seconds later the door opened and the man, who was clearly drunk, gave me a big smile and gestured for me to use the bathroom. He opened the door and I stepped inside. The man didn't exit the bathroom and began to wash his hands. Frankly, I had to pee so badly that I didn't even give a second thought to the man standing behind me. Well, that was a mistake.

As I was "making water" (as Huyen would say) I looked down and saw a hand reach through my legs and grab my thigh. I yelled out "What the fuck!" as I instincitvely jumped up and clenched my fists. I turned around to see the man laughing maniacally behind me and quickly darted out of the bathroom. It took me a second or two to grasp what had just happened. I finished peeing, washed my hands and walked back into the restaurant. Immediately I went up to my buddy Long and said, "One of the weirdest things ever just happened to me." Long's interest was peaked and asked me what happened. I started to tell Long my story but I was interupted by a tap on my shoulder. Standing over me was a 20-something Vietnamese English-hooligan-wanna-be who said in broken English, "My Dad would like to buy you a drink." He then pointed to his table and sitting there was the man who had just fondled my leg in the bathroom. Yeah, I don't get it either.