Cambodia, Our 51st State

(PICTURE: Ryan and me at the Royal Palace)

Did you know that Cambodia is part of America? Well, don't feel bad because I had no clue either. It became quickly apparent to me though that indeed Cambodia deserves a star on the old red, white and blue when I saw the first exchange of money--it was in American dollars. That's right, despite having its own currency, Cambodians deal in hard earned Uncle Sam currency. You pay in dollars and then are given dollars in return. However, for small change, instead of quarters, nickles and dimes you're given back Cambodian riel. This was and is totally weird to me. It became even weirder when Ryan, needing cash, went to the ATM and withdrew money in American dollars. Totally bizzare.

Today we're taking a tour of the city in a tuk-tuk, basically a horse and carriage where the horse is replaced by a motorbike. It's the standard tourist transportation around here. It also turns out that I'll be in Cambodia for 14 days, a bit longer than I originally though. On one hand this is really cool since when will I ever again spend fourteen days in Cambodia? However, on the other hand, I just got a taste for Vietnam and want more.

Viet-Freaking-Nam!

(PICTURE: Behind these guys were 1,000 more people on bikes. Better pictures next week when my camera battery isn't dead)

After six weeks of backpacking, and twenty years of having an unexplainable obsession with the country, I've finally stepped foot in Vietnam--and I already love it! I have a countless amount of first impressions which I'll try and quickly rattle off since I've got to go catch a bus to Cambodia (Yes, I'm already leaving the country). So, here's my quick list:

1. #1 isn't about the country but about my Vietnamese best friend Hien. She's amazing. She was waiting at the arrival exit with a 8x10 welcome sign for me. She choose a strong font with a nice backdrop shading which really showed she put some thought into it. We gave each other a big hug and I quickly realized that I was going to feel quite tall in this country--she came up to about the start of my totally awesome, perfectly crafted pectoral muscles. Hien told me that for now on she was going to walk on the sidewalk and I was going to walk on the street to give her a few more inches. However, there's no freaking way I'm walking on the street! Thus point #2...

2. Every person I told that I was going to Vietnam warned me that crossing the street was absolute madness. Jeff Aidekman, hearts player extraordinare, was the first person to give me the tip: "Don't hesitate."  Well, the warnings about the traffic were not exaggerated. In fact, you can't exaggerate what it is like to cross the street. There are literally hundreds of motorbikes flying down the street at you at any given time. They form what appears to be an impenetrable wall. But they aren't just on the street, sometimes they are flying at you on the sidewalk. And they aren't necessarily going in the right direction. I was on a one way street and was nearly run over by a family of four zooming against traffic. It's crazy! I mean IT IS CRAZY! I can't stop giggling every time I need to get from one side of the street to another. It must be some weird psychological defense that has come loose inside of me.  Ryan, the other student taking the TEFL course, said it best, "You have to throw away everything you were taught as a kid when crossing the street in order to make it here." He also added, "Just don't look when you cross the street and you'll be fine." 

3. The food is amazing. Hien has promised to look out for my demanding stomach and has taken the responsibility of making sure I'm well fed. We had lunch and dinner with Languagecorps students and alumni and each time the table was covered with produce that could not have been plucked from the ground more than twelve hours earlier, fish that must have been reeled in that day, and pork that...well, I can't vouch for the pork. 

4. I'm going to become a coffee drinker. Yup, you read that right. I'm into coffee now. I'm survived twenty four years without the brewed bean but times are changing. Hien introduced me to Vietnamese coffee and it is awesome. Basically they take condensed milk and combine it with pure coffee that was poured out of what appeared to be an old coke bottle. They put the whole thing over ice and then charge you a whopping thirty cents. It's the sweetest drink I've ever had and definitely packs a punch. After barely sleeping for a few days it gave me the energy I needed to make it through the afternoon. So in conclusion for #4, an addict has been born. 

5. Ryan and I visited the War Remnants Museum formerly known as the Museum of American War Crimes. The images and exhibition were extremely disturbing. I opened up a sign in book that had people's impressions in it. Most people complained that the museum was one-sided. I mean, what did they expect from a place formerly known as the Museum of American War Crimes. Even if it is one-sided that doesn't take away from the fact that our country did a lot of bad things in a war that shouldn't have been fought. Walking along the halls one couldn't help think how history was repeating itself in Iraq--how thousands upon thousand upon millions and millions of innocent civilians are affected by war; and specifically wars that should not have been fought. 

6. On a more light hearted note, after not seeing any bugs in China, I'm sitting here with at least three aunts crawling on me. 

7. It's hot as hell here. This means my Gold Bond rations may have to be increased. 

8. Hien is amazing. Did I mention that? She insisted on doing my laundry! 

9. There are lots of creepy old white guys, usually sporting mustaches, walking around this city with young Vietnamese girlfriends. 

10. Despite the American dollar taking a nose dive, this place is cheap! I only had about $20 coming in and told Hien I needed an ATM. She said, "oh, that should last you about two weeks." Even if it lasts me a week I figure I can now live here for four years without ever taking a job. Sorry, Mom and Dad. 

Finally, a very special thanks to my editor, Hannah. Thanks for posting all my blogs the last couple of weeks. Rest assured that there will be plenty of other times I'm gonna need you to post again. i.e. the next ten days. 

Okay, I have to run to get the bus. We're headed to Cambodia to meet up with the new students from Languagecorps Thailand and Cambodia. We're doing two weeks of teacher training and taking a three day field trip to Angkor Wat. It should all be amazing.

KING OF KONG

For the first time in my six weeks of traveling, I'm leaving a city feeling like there was more to see. Hong Kong had me running around from early morning to late at night every day. Yesterday, along with my new German buddy (first impressions aren't always right. Reiner turned out to be a pretty good guy and actually hadn't left me the morning of the hike. He had gone to do laundry and when he returned I had already left) and a new friend from Ireland named Olive. I had come up with an itinerary for the day that included going to Lantau Island to see the world's largest Buddha, then to take a stroll on a Buddhist wisdom path, eat lunch in a monastery, and then visit Tai-O, an old school fishing village.

When we got to Lantau we took the most traditional form of transportation -- a cable car to the Big Buddha. From quite a distance away we could see the resting bronze statue overlooking the mountains. The title didn't lie. He was big. He was huge. However, there is still one bigger Bud. Yup, you got it—Buddy August. I mean sure the Buddha probably weighs a few hundred more tons than my Dad and might be a few stories taller but when was the last time Buddha was elected to town council? Buddy August 1, Buddha 0.

The walk along the wisdom path taught me many important life lessons. Despite not being able to read Sanskrit, I felt that through osmosis knowledge was flooding into my brain. These were the pillars of the ancients. Words that have inspired monks to strive for purity and divinity their whole lifetimes. Sayings and mantras that couldn't be simply learned by opening a fortune cookie or flipping over a Snapple bottle. These were sayings passed down from generation to generation. Well, that's what I thought until I read the plaque that the wisdom path had been constructed three years ago. Still, I'm sure the rest of that is true. It's not like they built the path to attract tourists. It's not like they'd put aside their morals for modern commercialism. It's not like they'd open up a Starbucks at the base of the Big Buddha…Oh wait, they did. As amazing as the sites at the Big Buddha are, something just felt tainted knowing I could stroll two minutes away and order a tall iced latte.

As far as the lunch at the monastery--worst meal in China. The food was edible but I had envisioned monks feeding me, or at least chowing down next to me. Instead Olive, Reiner and I found ourselves sitting in a cafeteria next door to the monastery being served by a woman who was definitely in the early stages of a severe cold.

Throughout the day Reiner kept referring to me as "Mr. Tour Guide" and "Big Brother." I think the Big Brother reference wasn't Orwellian but rather that I was looking after him and Olive with my well-structured itinerary. After lunch we headed to Tai-O, which was worth the side trip. The small town consists of a street market and houses built on stilts above the water. Olive and I walked around as Reiner took a twenty-five minute boat ride to go see dolphins—a trip that proved fruitless. After strolling the streets and buying some funnel-cake like street food we headed back to our hostel.

As I said in the opening paragraph, there were a lot of things I didn't get to do in Hong Kong. For one, I didn't do the #1 tourist stop, which is a tram ride up to "the peak." It's like it sounds, a high point where you can get a three hundred and sixty degree view of the city. I wanted to take the trip but kept pushing it off. Last night as I rushed through my final Chinese meal I debated on taking the last tram up…but then started to fall asleep at dinner. As they say during Passover, "Next year at the peak."

That said, Hong Kong is amazing but definitely not one of my favorite cities I've visited on this trip. Right now I'm in the mindset of looking for things that are totally different than what I'm used to. Hong Kong feels western. It feels like NYC with a lot more neon signs.

Today I'm flying into Vietnam for just twenty-four hours before headed to Cambodia for ten days. Here I come 'Nam!!!

The Revenge of the Dragon

I blogged too soon yesterday. Dragon's Back Hike didn't kill me but Dragon Club nearly did. Last night following a traditional Chinese meal of Spanish tapas, I went to this ritzy club with Della and her friends. Immediately upon seeing the name of the club (and having been stopped by the doorman for being a dude) I knew bad things were in store. After sneaking into the club (AKA walking really fast behind two hot girls as they were allowed in) Della's friend Dave and I began to check out the place and the clientele. We couldn't have been in the club for more than twenty minutes when all of a sudden my eyes started to burn and I began to sneeze like I've never sneezed before. My throat started to itch and my eyes began to water. Dave looked at me like I was crazy as I began to head towards the exit for fresh air. Seconds later the whole club began to cough, sneeze and dart for the exit. It was a mad rush onto the streets of Hong Kong as probably four hundred bewildered and confused people spilled out, drinks in hand, into the night traffic. It turns out, someone had released pepper spray into the club. I knew who did it right away -- it was the dragon.

The only thought running through my head was, "this is how Alex must have felt all those times." Alex, despite his love of baseball, isn't always great at reading signs. Aidekman told me about "all those times Alex was pepper sprayed at camp." I didn't really believe him until the first time Alex ran out of a Syracuse bar, tear ducks dripping. We used to have a saying in college, "the night's not over till Alex gets sprayed." Here's a picture of the time Alex was sprayed by a bridesmaid at Glenn's wedding...




















(Editor's Note: If you were as confused by the last paragraph as I was, but don't have Ben's email address because you're one of my friends reading this, allow me to assist. Turns out Ben was lazy and didn't bring out his camera today so rather than leave his faithful readers in a pictureless lurch, he thought he'd post this pic of Alex along with an elaborate lie framed as a "joke." So to refresh, Alex is not a handsy drunk who gets peppersprayed. Usually he just gets a knee to the groin.)

The Dragon's Back

Steve Song's friend Della lives in Hong Kong and emailed me a list of must see/do things in the city. One of the things on the list was called "The Dragon Back Hike" which she noted was called "the best urban hike in Asia" by TIME magazine. Well, I like hikes and although I'm partial to NEWSWEEK, I decided to give it a go today. I mentioned the hike to this weirdo German in my hostel room (Why is he weird? Well, when I walked in yesterday I said "How are you doing?" and he looked blankly at me, said nothing, and went back to folding his socks. Five minutes later he turned to me and said, "I hate this fucking city.") and he did some internet research and wrote down on a piece of paper how to find the hike. Well this morning he and I awoke bright and early around 6:50. He got up first and waved good morning and went to the bathroom. When he came back I went to the bathroom. When I came back he was gone. I waited thirty minutes and he still was gone. I thought this was weird but then again I've been referring to him in both this email and my mind as "the weirdo German." The strange thing was that the paper he wrote the directions to the hike was still on the counter in our room. I copied down the directions and put it into my pocket. It occurred to me right away that copying direction from a person who doesn't speak English as his first language or well at all wasn't a good idea. I tried to get into the hostel computer room but it was locked until 9AM. Instead of waiting two hours I decided to just wing it with the badly translated, chicken scratch directions. Would this come back to bite me in the butt?....Can you say cliffhanger?

After catching the subway and changing to a bus I felt really confidant. I asked the bus driver, "Do you know where the dragon's back hike starts?" He said he did and would tell me when to get off. I was in the midst of reading on the top deck of the bus when I heard the bus driver bang and yell, "Dragon's Back!" I wasn't ready to get off yet and gathered up my stuff and in the melee left my black LA hat. This is good news for all of you who hated that hat. I thanked the bus driver and jumped off the bus. As soon as the bus pulled away I looked at my surroundings--I was in the middle of nowhere. There was a foot path which I started to walk on and came to a sign, the one pictured above. Immediately I realized I might have had some bad judgement on doing this hike. Lets examine the sign and my situation at the time:

1. "Always go hiking with the company of others." I WAS ALONE.

2. "Plan your route carefully before setting out." I HAD NO IDEA WHERE I WAS GOING OR WHERE I WAS STARTING.

3. "Always bring a map and advice your family and friends of where you are going and when you will be coming back." NO MAP. NO FAMILY OR FRIENDS HAD BEEN ADVISED.

4. "To avoid mosquito bites, wear light colored long sleeve shirts, trousers not shorts, wear insect repellent." I HAD ON A DARK GREEN LONG-SLEEVED SHIRT, SHORTS AND NO REPELLENT.

5. "Wear a hat and use sunscreen." LEFT MY HAT ON THE BUS. LEFT MY SUNSCREEN IN AUSTRALIA.

6. "...Drink plenty of water." I HAD A LARGE BOTTLE OF WATER...WHICH I DRANK HALF OF DURING THE NIGHT.

7. "Avoid bringing a large amount of cash and valuable belongings. Minimize the number of credit and ATM cards you carry." I HAD ALL OF MY MONEY, CREDIT CARDS AND ATM CARDS ON ME.

#7 I thought was kind of weird until I read #8.

8. "If get robbed, remain calm and avoid confronting the robbers." WHAT?! IF I GET ROBBED! WHAT THE HELL! I DON'T WANT TO GET ROBBED! I JUST WANT TO HIKE THE FREAKING DRAGON'S BACK.

To make me even more paranoid the next note was about being robbed too. Where the hell was I?

And the icing on the cake was one of the final warning: "Bring your mobile phone." I HAD NO PHONE.

The smart thing in this case would have been to stay on the road and wait for the next bus going back to town. However, Ben August doesn't always play the smart card (i.e. Breaking up with Brooke Rose in 4th Grade, Not investing in plastics in the 80s, etc. etc.)

I began the hike and was completely paranoid. Within about ten minutes I heard footsteps behind me and saw this guy quickly running up the trail. Who the hell was he? Why did he want to rob me? I came up with a quick game plan and moved all my big bills, credit cards and ATM cards into my shirt pocket. He would never look their, right? I then also grabbed my tripod out of my bag as a self-defense mechanism. His 12" knife would have nothing on me since my tripod could extend to 42". I picked up my pace and came to a fork in the road. I took the sign for Dragon's Back. Sure enough he went the other way. You'd think this was a good sign but I was sure he was radioing his friends up ahead that the idiot tourist was coming...

Once on top of the Dragon's Back I realized why this was such a highly touted hike. The hike gives you a 360 degree view of the ocean and different bays. It was spectacular despite a slight haze over the whole area. I took out my camera and snapped some pictures. I was disappointed with how they were turning out but told myself it didn't matter anyway since I was probably gonna get mugged up ahead and wouldn't have my camera anymore anyway.

I kept hiking and hiking and passed a few other suspicious character: an elderly couple who appeared to be going for a casual hike but in my mind were ready to rough up some tourist punk, a mountain biker who was suspiciously blowing up his tire with a bike pump, and a kid wearing a European soccer jersey. Finally, I came to another fork in the road. One way led back to the road where the bus would pick me up and other way led to Big Wave Bay. I debated on what to do when I saw a building up ahead. It seemed strange to me that a building was in the middle of the woods so I went for a closer inspection. In case my paranoia wasn't high enough it soon exponentially increased. The building was the HONG KONG CORRECTIONAL FACILITY. Yes, a freaking prison! A normal person at this point would definitely hit the main road and get the hell out of dodge. But as my dad can attest, I'm not normal. I headed for Big Wave Bay.

Long story short, I made it out okay and stumbled into some really cool beach towns. Unfortunately I hadn't brought my speedos or towel but was craving a dip in the water. I debated on going in in my undies but was quickly deterred by a sign that read, "Stay away from shark nets." For once today I made a good decision and stayed on land....

Window Seat

(PICTURE: A Lady Who Asked Me To Take Her Picture The Other Day)

I'm sitting in seat 43A on Dragonair flight 895 to Hong Kong. I'm not sure, but I'd put pretty good money on it that the woman next to me is the Chinese Fran Drescher. Her voice could not be more annoying and she has literally not stopped talking for two hours to her friends across the aisle. Actually that isn't totally true. She's taken a few breaks from her ramblings to spit into the vomit bag. This may seem slightly vile but in comparison to most people in China it's quite civil. The mentality here is that the sidewalks are one giant communal Kleenex, free to spit on. Even worse than the constant irritating chatter is that her elbows are out of control and she has nailed me in the chest at least eight time—including seconds after I finally dozed off earlier.

Okay, she's now reading my computer screen so lets just hope she doesn't understand English. Wait for it, wait for it, wait for it….no reaction. Good, I can keep typing. Not awkward at all.

Getting to the Shanghai Airport this morning was an adventure. I jumped on the subway at 7AM since I was told that it would not be crowded. This was simply not true. Not even close to being true. I managed to squeeze onto the train with my giant twenty two kilogram bag. I got plenty of looks from the morning commuters for taking up valuable metro space. However, I didn't feel too bad because right next to me was a guy with a bike. But he had prime real estate up against a wall. I was stuck smack in the middle of everyone. Eventually I got to the maglev train – the world's fastest train – and took an eight minute ride to the airport. I checked in for my flight and then made a few calls with my Chinese calling card. I talked with Mom (Dad was at a Town Council meeting), Grandma (I talked with Nanny last week on her birthday) and Zev. Unfortunately my sister/sub-in-blogger screened her call and didn't pick up. Apparently she doesn't like calls from China.

Well, I'll be landing in Hong Kong soon. I'm excited to see the city (wait, is it or is it not its own country? I'm confused on what happened when Britain left in '97. I'd look this up on wikipedia but it's one of the blocked sites in China) but I'm getting very antsy to finally get to Vietnam. Every day I email with my Vietnamese best friend Hien (her name means crocodile in Vietnamese but from what I can tell she's pretty harmless) who works at the school I'll be getting TEFL certified through. Hien is picking me up at the airport on Friday and taking me to lunch with some of her coworkers. Then that night we're going to the Languagecorps graduation dinner for the past class. The point is, Vietnam is on the horizon and I couldn't be more excited…I just have to remember not to overlook Hong Kong.

(Editor's Note: I didn't screen the call, I just didn't hear my phone. But in Ben's defense if I had heard my phone I probably would have screened it.)

Good Timing

(PICTURE: Eva and me on The Bund)

About a week before I left the states I received a text message from one of my favorite fellow Orange Alumni--Lene Dahl. Without a doubt Lene was the smartest person I met at Syracuse. Technically, even if she wasn't, she came across that way with her slight Dutch accent. For anyone who has traveled in Europe, it's a fact that Europeans just sound smarter than us. I'd trust a five year old with a British accent over my own brother any day of the week in a trivia contest. Lene's text was something like, "What are you up to?" I naturally replied, "Moving to Vietnam in a couple days." After a few back and forth texts, I told Lene about my travel plans and she mentioned that her cousin lived in Shanghai and her sister was living in Cambodia. Always one for meeting a local whenever I travel (AKA mooching off a stranger), I got their emails and introduced myself. The next morning I received an email back from Lene's cousin Eva. Before I knew it I had an invitation to sleep in her extra bedroom--an opportunity I could never turn down.

To use the lexicon of a seventh grade girl, Eva has been the "hostest with the mostest." I told Eva that I cared about two things: eating and eating some more. Eva assured me this was her speciality and she has proven it meal after meal since my arrival. Eva is half Chinese and half Dutch (Just like Lene) and speaks fluent Cantonese. After eleven days of traveling with hand gestures and a vocabulary consisting of "hello" and "thank you" it has been amazing to be shown around by someone who speaks the language and looks like a local. I immediately knew things were going to be different in Shanghai when we walked up to a local street vendor selling buns. Eva asked for one pork and one vegetable bun. I took out 10RMB to pay. Eva told me it was just 2RMB. 2RMB!!! That's like thirty cents. This same culinary purchase anywhere else during my travels would have cost me at least 10RMB--the foreigner price.

Shanghai isn't a city with much to see. This is a place of business and not a place of sights. There are a few museums and major walking streets but nothing that jumps out at you and says, "this is China." Well except for the millions of Chinese people and all the signs. But besides that I feel like I'm just in New York's China Town...if China Town grew exponentially in size and had no seeming driving laws. That said, I'm loving it here. Eva and I have literally just walked around the city and eaten at every turn. We ate wonderful Cantonese food the first night I was here with the highlight being my first taste of jellyfish. Eva said that many foreigners don't like the crunchiness of jellyfish--but I'm not a typical foreigner. I devoured half a plate that was supposed to be split between four of us. Whoops.

The other thing I've been doing a lot of in Shanghai is playing backgammon. Between Dad and I playing two days before I left Jersey, and having played four hours on the Cathay Pacific flight to Hong Kong, I consider myself one of the greatest backgammon players in the world. After letting Eva win our first two games and having her brag about how great she was in backgammon, I introduced the betting dice. Five games later she owed me 39 beers.

Today I'm off to meet some friends I met at The Great Wall who happen to be in Shanghai today. After that I'm headed to the fabric district to pick up two shirts I had made (I decided wearing the same green safari shirt was starting to look disgusting in all my pictures...so I had a black and white one made just like it). Following that I'll be headed to a local massage parlor to get a rub down by a blind man who I was told "works magic." It's tough work traveling and I deserve a little R&R today.