Tears, Tears, Tears

I hate crying. Hate it. When someone I love cries, it makes me want to cry. If this sounds familiar it's because I talked about crying in the first blog entry I ever wrote. Well, things haven't changed. My dad has teared up a few times recently when he starts to think about me leaving. When I gave my brother a hug and a kiss goodbye the other day, my dad is the one who started to cry. I've come to accept that my dad is a big softy -- but accepting that doesn't make it any easier. My dad loves his children (and grandchild) more than anything. If I had to say one absolute fact about my father that would be it. Knowing that, I understand how hard it is to see one of his kids leave for the other side of the world...

My dad crying is inevitable. What is always harder to deal with is when my mother starts to cry. The other night I went to a concert with my parents and out of the corner of my eye I could see tears starting to run down my mother's face. Seeing my mom cry is gut wrenching. My mother is an angel and it pains me to think of her in any pain especially when it is my fault. I put my arm around her shoulder at the concert. That's all I could do. Even when I start to type about my mother crying, I begin to cry myself. I hate it. I hate crying.

And this is why life is unfair. Last night I talked to Huyen on Skype for the last time before I'll see her...and she began to cry. I have someone on the other side of the world who is brought to tears because they get to hug me hello, and people here who are brought to tears because they have to hug me goodbye. I feel lucky to have this much love in my life but at the same time feel really unlucky that all the people I love aren't in one place.

A few nights ago I was talking to Huyen and told her that I was feeling sad about leaving my family. Huyen of course began to cry, feeling bad for me and my family. When I woke up in the morning I had an email from her. She wrote: "Do you know that I love you so much! That why I can feel your feeling! I know it is hard when we have to be away from our family! But I think you will be ok and just want to remind you that you always have your second family in Vietnam and that is my family! They all love you and always welcome you! Especially you have me! I always want to make you happy! You will see your parents soon too! Just be happy because your parents are the GREATEST PARENTS! They want you happy too! All the people you love are always very close to you, they are always in our MIND, our HEART!"

Huyen's right, I do have the greatest parents and they are always in my mind and heart.

Being home makes you realize how special your loved ones are. I was greeted at the airport three months ago by my sister who took a train four hours to see me. The other day I was handed a photo album by my brother and sister-in-law with pictures of me and Lilah. It's been amazing seeing them as parents and in just three months seeing my niece grow. I've hugged and kissed my grandmothers both multiple times regardless if they've encouraged my adventures (Nanny) or told me to get the heck home (Grandma Cele). Every place I traveled I was greeted with both hugs from my friends and sheets on their couches, pull-out beds and air mattresses. I love being home for one reason -- the people.

So thanks everyone for making the last three months so amazing...

$2,528.39

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

That is 70 thank yous for all the people who contributed to the Habitat For Humanity fund. It's pretty amazing that between 70 of us we are going to change a family's life for the better, forever. This has truly been a team effort among friends, family and total strangers who read my blog. Yesterday I transferred all of the money from the bank account I opened to Habitat in Vietnam. The grand total is $2,528.39!!!!

The Sorrow Of War

This morning I finished one of the books recommended to me. The book is called "The Sorrow Of War" by Bao Ninh. I have read many books about the Vietnam war but this is the first one I've read that was written by a North Vietnamese soldier.

The book was extremely well written and proves to me once again that there are no winners in war. The other underlining theme of the novel is that wars don't end when treaties are signed. Wars stick with people forever. The author wrote: "Each of us carried in his heart a separate war which in many ways was totally different, despite our common cause. We had different memories of people we'd known and of the war itself, and we had different destinies in the postwar years. Our only postwar similarities stemmed from the fact that everyone had experienced difficult, painful, and different fates."

There are many powerful stories and images within the novel but perhaps the most powerful thing of all is when you read the last page. After the novel is finished, on a single page is the paragraph about the author. It says: "Bao Ninh served with the Glorious 27th Youth Brigade. Of the five hundred who went to war with the Brigade in 1969, he is one of ten who survived. He lives in Hanoi."

Saute Moutons (White Clouds)

(PICTURE: Evan, Mike, Brad and Me in the front row.)

This blog is long overdue. My excuse: I scanned these pictures last night after having them for nearly two months.

For those of you who don't remember, upon coming back to the USA I almost immediately got back on a plane and went to Montreal for my best friend Brad's bachelor party. Brad had told me he wanted to go jetboating in Montreal but unfortunately the weather didn't cooperate with us the day we planned on going. On Sunday morning I woke up and called the jetboat company around 8:30 and asked if they were doing a 10AM boat trip. The person who picked up said they were, but we had to get there an hour early. I woke up Brad and asked if he wanted to go. He did. I then called a couple of guys' rooms and asked if they wanted to come. I got two more suckers -- Mike and Evan -- to join us. We all ran downstairs and jumped into a cab which got us to the dock at 9AM. We were dropped at the wrong dock so I ran down the port and got to the right one. When I arrived NOBODY was there except a few staff. One of the staff was the owner who told me that he had a trip booked with a middle school. He said they would make room for us or take a second boat. This was great...sort of. There were a few things that weren't cool...or in actuality, waaaaaay to cool:
1) It was FREEZING outside.
2) We did not have warm clothes on.
3) We were given damp sweaters to put on.
4) The owner preceded to talk and talk and talk...until Brad told him he had a flight to catch at 1. The owner literally talked for an hour so we got on the boats at nearly 11AM. This put Brad into a small state of panic that he'd miss his flight just so he could be drenched in rapids.

In the end, it all worked out and we had a blast. The ride was ridiculous. Basically these jetboats go head first into Grade IV rapids. Everyone gets annihilated by freezing cold water...which feels extra chilly because of the insanely cold winds. After we docked, the four of us threw off our clothes and sprinted to the street. We got a taxi and back to the hotel in pretty good time. The rest of the 1PM flying crew was waiting for Brad in the lobby and they all quickly took off and caught their plane. Without a doubt, it was one of the most memorable parts of the weekend.

Oh, and we got these great pictures:

Fifteen Months!

The count-up continues! Huyen and I have officially been together for 15 months!!!!

More importantly though, the countdown continues. I'll be hugging Huyen at the Nobai airport in SIX DAYS!!!!

F*$K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You do the math: What happens when you take a person who sleeps with a glass of water next to his bed because he wakes up every night thirsty AND this person happens to have a girlfriend in Vietnam that he talks to on his laptop right before going to bed?

I'll give you ten seconds to figure this one out...


Yup, last night at 2AM I woke up to take a sip of water and spilled my glass. I immediately sprung up from bed and grabbed my laptop to dry it. There was only a little bit of water on my computer and I thought the cost was clear when I opened my laptop and saw that it was working. I then immediately closed my laptop and placed it on dry land. This morning I woke up and it isn't working. (FYI: I'm writing this from my mom's desktop.) I went on to a bunch of computer forums this morning and the #1 piece of advice was to do exactly the opposite of what I did last night. Everyone says that if a liquid gets on your laptop you should immediately take out the battery and unplug the computer. By turning it on you can short the components inside. Greeeeeeaaaaat. There were a few other people who said that they just let their laptop dry out for a day or two and then it worked again. My fingers are crossed that this will work.

The best/worst part of this whole thing is this:
1. Every night I've worried about this exact situation happening. I usually get out of bed and place the laptop on higher ground after talking to Huyen.
2. With my last mac I had Applecare. I didn't end up needing Applecare since the ninjas stole my computer. With this laptop I opted to not get applecare because, well, I was worried it might get stolen again and an extended warranty means nothing when your computer is stolen.
3. This of course had to happen the last week I'm in the states. Hopefully the computer will work again when I next give it a try...or else I'll be able to fix it before I head back to Vietnam.

Maybe this is a sign I should not be a computer owner.

Monsoons

One thing that New York and Hanoi has in common is monsoon-like torrential downpours. Yesterday for the second time since I've been home, I've gotten caught outside in the middle of a ridiculous thundershower. There are a few differences in getting caught in the rain in Vietnam and in "The Big Apple" though:

1) In Vietnam everyone and their brother will try to sell you a poncho as soon as it starts to rain. In New York, every other store will sell you umbrellas.

2) In New York you can duck into the subway to stay dry and get where you need to go. In Hanoi, You've got to throw on your poncho, roll up your pants and drive your motorbike.

3) In New York you're pretty sure lightning will hit a tall building with a lightning rod. In Hanoi, well, you might be that tall building.